Wednesday, October 6, 2010

心懷月光死亡也是美麗

在全國少年“生命”攝影大賽的終評會上,一幅作品征服了所有的評委。無論是思想前衛的年青評委,還是資歷深濃的年邁評委,都毫不猶豫地投下了自己的一票。
我是評委之一,也是一名資深的攝影記者。各種各樣的攝影作品我見過不計其數,但如此震撼人心的作品,我還從未見過。

這是一幅黑白攝影作品。畫面上,兩座山峰的形狀很恐怖,山體是交織紛亂的網狀物,透著陰森森的黑色。第一眼看到它的時候,眼前躍出的是兩顆骷髏。然而,在這兩座陰森網狀物的兩端和一側,卻出人意料地閃現出耀眼的亮色。這亮色是那樣不可抵御,不可戰勝。
這是一道神奇的靈光!山峰的背後,是漆黑的墨色,墨色的深處,一輪明月掛中天。這山峰上的亮色就來自這輪皎潔的月亮。哦,這是一道黑暗與光明對峙的幽谷,一道絕望與希望對峙的幽谷。一道死亡與新生對峙的幽谷!
月亮谷──驚心動魄的生命之谷!
《月亮谷》的作者是誰?他何以創作出如此傑作?
作者的一封附信揭開了祕密︰
我是一個癌症患者,今年12歲。
5歲的時候,身為攝影愛好者的爸爸把著我的手,在相機上按下了快門,我拍出了平生第一張照片──一花盆裡剛剛破土的綠芽。我高興極了,我沒想到我的小手竟能拍出如此美妙的照片!從此,攝影便與我的生命連在了一起。
每到星期天,爸爸便騎上單車,帶上我外出拍照。大山、大河、樹林、原野、海濱、湖畔、都市、村莊,無處不留下我的足跡。
我拍出了一張又一張照片,受到了一次又一次心靈的陶冶,我終於成了一名頗有成績的少年攝影愛好者。
就在我對攝影的興趣越來越濃的時候,我突然患了骨癌。
這一年來,治病幾乎成了我生活的全部內容。然而,在我心中,攝影依然是第一需要。治病的空余時間,我一直沒有停止攝影活動。我想︰我的生命可能極為短暫了,越是短暫,我越要加緊拍攝,多拍一張照片,我的生命就多延長一分。
上個月,醫生坦率地對我說︰“很對不起,我們必須如實地告訴你︰最近的一次癌細胞切片檢查,表明你的生命已經臨近了終點。”
我沒有惶恐,也沒有痛苦。此時此刻,我竟然萌生了一個連我自己都感到震撼的構想︰
用我切片中的癌細胞,拍攝我生命歷程的最後一張照片!
醫生被我的構想感動了。他把我癌細胞的切片在儀器上為我展現出來。看到這怪異的圖景,我驚呆了︰癌細胞是如此地醜陋,醜陋地令人毛骨悚然!然而,在儀器的強光照耀下,它又竟然是那樣美麗,美麗得震撼靈魂!醜陋、與美麗之所以如此對立而又融洽,大概緣於光明的照耀。於是,我在電腦上把兩個癌細胞圖象掃描了進去,構成了兩座大山,在悠遠漆黑的蒼穹之上,我製作了一輪明月,這輪明月是我在初春的第一個望日拍下的。
這幅作品的名稱,我想了很久。最終,我把它定名為︰月亮谷。
我想用這幅作品告訴人們一句話︰
只要心懷光明,死亡也是美麗的!
太動人了!
記者的本能驅使我,趕快去採訪這幅作品的拍攝者,我一定要寫一篇重頭報道,發表在報紙的頭版頭條!
我按照作者所寫的位址,找到他家時卻得知︰
他已經去了!
在弄清我的來意之後,悲痛的父親轉告了兒子臨終時的囑托,並希望我成為他兒子臨終囑托的完成者。我堅定地答應了。
回到北京,我一絲不苟地照著死者的囑托履行了。我把《月亮谷》用最精美的鏡框鑲嵌起來,專程從少年宮送到了中國抗癌基金會,請他們轉贈給所有的少年癌症患者。作品的下方,我用金字印上了死者用生命鑄就的箴言︰
只要心懷光明,死亡也是美麗的!

Posted by li in 04:38:31 | Permalink | No Comments »

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

爲什麽臉紅

“臉紅什麼?”“精神煥發。”“怎么又黃了?”“呵呵呵呵呵呵,防冷涂的蠟。”在只有樣板戲可看的年代,國劇《智取威虎山》的這段對白就連小孩也愛模仿。一個人突然臉紅當然不是因為精神煥發,更可能是因為精神緊張。你如果心裡有鬼而感到不安,或者處境尷尬而難堪,或者見到暗戀的人而害羞,或者受到讚揚而不好意思……突然間臉上一熱,你知道你臉紅了。

這個過程是交感神經的興奮導致的,意識無法控制,你越想控制自己不臉紅,反而會讓臉紅加劇。這其實是一種應激回應︰在你感到不安、難堪、害羞、不好意思的時候,身體大量分泌腎上腺素。這種激素讓你的呼吸加重、心跳加快、瞳孔放大,為戰鬥或逃跑做好準備。它同時也讓血管舒張,以便增加血液流量,提供更多的氧氣。血液中攜帶氧氣的紅細胞讓皮膚出現了紅暈。
這是全身做出的回應,為什麼只有臉部的皮膚發紅,而其他部位的皮膚顏色看不出變化呢?這有兩方面的原因。與其他部位的皮膚相比,臉部皮膚的血管更密集、更寬、更靠近表層,因此它發生的變化更容易被別人覺察到。更重要的是,一般皮膚的靜脈只含有α腎上腺素受體,而臉部皮膚的靜脈卻同時含有α和β 兩種腎上腺素受體。這兩種受體都接受來自腎上腺素的信號,但是性質不同。α腎上腺素受體對腎上腺素較不敏感,而且起到的是讓血管收縮的作用;而β腎上腺素受體則相反,它對腎上腺素較敏感,並讓血管舒張,更多的血液湧入了臉部皮膚,告訴人們你的不安。
但是,讓人們知道你心裡不安對你有什麼好處呢?或者說,這種臉紅的本能是怎么進化而來的呢?這個問題讓達爾文疑惑不解,在《人與動物的情感》一書中他用了整整一章的篇幅來討論臉紅。即使在現下,人為什麼會臉紅仍然是個進化論的難題。
人並不是一生下來就會臉紅的。他是在幼稚園階段開始出現的,在青春期達到了頂峰,之後逐漸下降,隨著年齡的增長,人們變得越來越不容易臉紅,或者說,“臉皮越來越濃”了。幼稚園階段是人的自我意識開始出現,並透過與他人的交往培養社會意識的時期。青春期少年有極強的自我意識,特別在乎別人對自己的看法,而成年人的自我意識又逐漸變得薄弱。臉紅的出現和變化似乎與人的自我意識的演變同步。此外,還有其他社會原素與臉紅有關。例如,女人要比男人更容易臉紅,歐洲人要比亞洲人更容易臉紅(這與膚色沒有關係,膚色深的歐洲人也能明顯地臉紅)。
這一切都表明臉紅是一種社會交流的模式。臉紅雖然不受意識的控制,但是又涉及非常進階的智能。一個人要會臉紅,不僅要有自我意識,而且還要能夠意識到其他意識的存在,設身處地地猜測其他個體的想法,也就是有移情能力。人類在三歲以後才有移情能力。其他動物只有類人猿才有這種能力。因此,只有人類,也許還有類人猿,才能用臉紅進行微妙的思想交流。
這種交流對自己、對他人都有好處。當你在暗戀對象面前臉紅時,讓對方覺察到你的感情,就有可能讓暗戀變成明戀。當你為做錯了事而臉紅時,就能讓人們知道了你的歉意,從而原諒你。當你因為內心的羞愧而臉紅時,就會讓人們覺得你很誠實、值得信賴,從而願意和你合作。當然,對人類來說,語言才是最主要的交流模式。但是語言是受意識控制的,可以進行欺騙,而不受意識控制的臉紅卻能透露真實的想法,這些想法有時是你想用語言掩飾的。臉紅發出的信號有時甚至比語言還要準確。
其他靈長類也能用裸露部位的皮膚顏色變化進行交流,例如臉紅表示發怒,臀部的紅腫表示發情。靈長類對皮膚顏色變化極為敏感,它可能與彩色視覺的起源有關。在哺乳動物中,只有靈長類具有三色視覺,能夠看到由三原色組成的彩色世界,其他哺乳動物都是色盲。這是由於靈長類的視網膜中有三種視錐細胞,感受不同波長的光︰S視錐的最佳吸收波長大約是440納米(藍光),M視錐的最佳吸收波長大約是540納米(偏綠光),而L視錐的最佳吸收波長大約是 560納米(偏紅光)。
為什麼M視錐和L視錐的最佳吸收波長如此接近?如果它們能間隔得遠一點顯然會更加合理(羽族的三種視錐的最佳吸收波長就是均勻分佈的)。原來,這樣的視錐波長分佈能夠最敏感地感覺到別人皮膚顏色的變化︰當靈長類的皮膚充滿含氧的血液時,其皮膚顏色的波長大約是550納米。從某種意義上說,我們長著這樣一雙敏感的眼睛,就是為了能夠輕易地看到你的臉紅。

Posted by li in 04:46:29 | Permalink | No Comments »

Monday, June 21, 2010

彼此珍惜

愛,千百年來,被世人討論了又討論的話題。無數痴男怨女演繹又演繹了的事件,如四季交替,周而複始。最後一切終將逃不過歲月的輪回。遙遠的期盼,彷彿可以在瞬間徹底看透。結局,或皆大歡喜,白頭偕老,或無奈離別,各奔東西。然而即便如此,為愛忙碌的人們依然如滔滔江水,延綿不斷,更有甚者不惜散盡錢財,傷及無辜,哪怕一無所獲。

不知是愛本身附帶的魔力使人難以抗拒,還是人們對愛的幻想太過美麗,悲傷的一幕,這邊隨處可見,彼岸卻又比翼成雙,如同兩個世界。每天或者說每個年代有多少人在不知疲倦的為愛努力,嘔心瀝血的為一段美滿的愛情鋪好平坦的路,在不同人的身上,總是可以看到不一樣的愛情。人生不如意之事。十常89。愛情也不例外。太過於追求完美往往會錯失現下所擁有的。

看似正確且完美的開始,卻不得已錯誤的結束留下一個遺憾的殘局,從陌生到熟悉,在從熟悉至陌生,然後成為最熟悉的陌生人,不知道如此淺白簡單的形容愛情是不是有些不夠全面,但從古至今,又有誰把愛情分析的一清二白?清清楚楚是我們永遠在追求而又始終得不到的答案。

我常說。愛不止是物質上的滿足和精神上的給予。它是彼此之間的一種默契。毫不需要刻意的安排。一個簡單的動作。一個淡淡的眼神。都是彼此交流感情的工具。相依相偎時。誰都曾想地久天長。那時愛就如【激勵器】一般的使我們愛不釋手。但世事難料。昨天的情人。今日就已形同陌路。這時的愛情儼然地成為了我們的【催命符】。茫茫人海。遇到一個和自己愛了的人。真的不容易的。人常說。前世的500次回眸才換來今生的一次相遇,對於前世。我們無從考証。關於今生。彈指即逝。誰也不敢說誰是誰的命中注定。下一個路口。不一定能遇到愛。人生短短的旅程。不可能在邂逅第二個他【她】如果愛了,就用心去呵護對方吧。

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Posted by li in 09:43:55 | Permalink | No Comments »

Thursday, June 17, 2010

結婚的意義

昨天一個同事說,她要結婚了,因為要趕著兩個人一起早一點買房子;不久前,朋友說,想結婚,因為想要一個孩子,生活實在沒有趣味;還聽到過不止一個人這樣說,對方條件還不錯,就結婚吧……很多結婚的理由,可是不知道為什麼都是這樣勉強的理由,讓人聽不出感情中喜樂悲哀的成分,我彷彿已經很久很久都沒有聽到有一個人說,他要結婚是因為很愛很愛一個人,因為想要和另一個人永遠的在一起。
也許永遠實在太遠,也許人生真的無法十全十美。
曾經在書上看到一位香港的女作家寫的一段話︰
“我們是不是已處在一個雞肋世紀?生活上有著太多食而無味、棄之可惜的人情與事物。上至婚姻、事業,下至中午時分匆匆吃下肚的那個便當,都可能是雞肋。”
讀這段文字的時候可以感覺到一種不見眼淚的悲傷和一種不見血肉的折磨,生活彷彿總在營造著一個又一個的缺陷。
有一天我碰上一個高中時候的女友,我知道很長一段時間以來她都在不停地相親,可是一直都沒有遇到滿意的,我於是問她,是不是要求太高了?是不是要那種高學歷,高收入,高身材的?因為熟,所以我的語氣中明顯帶著一些調侃。
她笑笑說,不是啊,她對這些倒不是太看重,其實相親是目的性很強的,就是奔著結婚的,但是她就是沒有那種感覺。
我知道這種只要感覺的人,是相親者中最難成功的,就忍不住逼問她到底要怎樣的結婚的感覺?
“我只是希望在我不開心的時候,他可以讓我覺得他會一直陪在我身邊,即使不安慰什麼,只是抱著我,緊些,緊些,再緊些,說,他會一直很愛我。”
她的表情堅定,沒有一絲玩笑的神情。
我忽然覺得有一點感動,像是在這個連月光都無法穿透的城市裡,看到了一線溫情的光。
我想我不一定要求對方一定要讓我感覺到切切的相思,苦苦的守候,或者綿綿的愛戀,我的婚姻也只需雲淡風輕,細水長流,但是有一天當他向我求婚時,不是因為婚姻能帶給他多少實際的利益,而是因為婚姻在他生活中的那份意義。
我希望在那一刻他可以給我一個理由,告訴我他想和我相守,一起度過生命中的每一次喜怒悲歡,一起相守到老。
即使只是在那一刻……

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Posted by li in 09:59:47 | Permalink | No Comments »

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Should accomplish after eight zero

Should accomplish after eight zero
1. 10 every day: Sleep before 00 o’clock, 7 every day: Get up before 30 o’clock;
2. Remind oneself every day, don’t forget the dream;
3. Read more if having time, study more, become a person with literary attainments, don’t waste time on anything weird funny;
4. Taking exercises more, there is nothing after the health has collapsed, the men and women should be a bit better to oneself;
5. The ability making great efforts to learn to make money, the money is a person’s living base, and the dignity of conducting oneself;
6. Often come back home to see the Mummy, often give elder sister’s elder brother a telephone, the kindred is the most precious emotion;
7. Learn to be a listener, should listen to others’ feeling more, obtain the lesson from it;
8. Learn to play, learn to have the playing of the grade;
9. The trouble at work, don’t take home, can not solve any problem, take back to add more and worried;
10. Person who is ambitious or tenacious of purpose working it;
11. Learn to flatter the leader, put more smiling faces, does not do to the evil person, with one’s lips sealed, think thrice before acting;
12. The society evades the thing, people are kind and is taken advantage of, Ma Shan is ridden;
13. Associate with people to have accomplishment, so as to not make influenced by it;
14. Not associating with the stingy person, it was always oneself that suffered a loss;
15. Want one stick kill to containing B person, let he (she) The ox does not stand up again next time!
16. Do not discuss the emotion with the married people or person who has already cohabitted, waste the talking mostly, nothing is not reaped finally, attack one’s own life passion instead;
17. Should look for it with the person with one’s own common values, the own person of the love, treasure carefully, protect carefully, all one’s life of the end;
18. Don’t waste the emotion on person hopeless, it is retarded that value the external person, understand, the person who really loved her had paying close attention to her at her side all the time originally only when all scratched up, she had thinking all the time the happiness was very remote;
19. Don’t put up with a person excessively, it will not the love to be excessive, make lowpricedly;
20. Reality a bit, love always so pale in front of reality, romantic love belong to man, belong to the woman;

21. The person who is ambitious or tenacious of purpose who does marriage, plan to step into the marriage carefully, plan to be a good husband’s good wife carefully;
22. The person who is ambitious or tenacious of purpose doing manual labour, plan to build a beautiful family, a safe and warm family diligently;
23. Don’t always want to do the Saviour, even if is the Saviour, it is unnecessary to go to save common people. Pitiful people, there are hateful places, and all Judas;
24. Don’t lend the money to others easily, the person who borrow money, a lot of do not want to return the money;
25. Reading to the persons of a lot of books clearly might not have much knowledges, but the person not going to school might not be an illiterate;
26. Don’t judge people solely by appearance, especially the woman, perhaps the beautiful one is a devil, an ugly one may be the angel, Heaven is always fair;
27. Should go back oneself, live for oneself;
28. Will disguise oneself, it is not a cool behavior to be slovenly, it is an unbred result;
29. Take one’s own way, let NB reveal the mouth cover!

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Posted by li in 09:19:00 | Permalink | No Comments »

Leave and lose forgetting

Leave and lose forgetting
I stand silently in the corner, am looking at this world, the crowd coming and going at will.
Everybody passing by me hurriedly of stride, go far gradually.
It seems that all people are in already leaving me, or will leave, and will be leaving
Looking at the quiet crowd who left away, I am frightened and uneasy, unusually lose.

Saw suddenly clearly oneself was an extremely cowardly person.
Originally, I feared the lonely one.
Originally, I minded these people.
One that is regardless of good friend surround, or in a person,
Always like having a very big one hole in the heart, empty, there is nothing, it seems to fill out discontent forever.
Always want to say some words to someone, but seem to be just speaking to oneself frequently.
Perhaps it is that I want too much.
And I want, invisible, unable to weigh, unable to catch, more unable to keep here.

The person that a piece of everything wants, is that nothing can be got mostly finally.
Others can not give I,either can’t,or unwilling
Having got back to this city that lets me feel more lonely again, it was dull and tasteless that my day got back to the past too.
In fact I do not hope for such lonely work,
I thirst for the gentle love,
I wish eagerly to be liked by the person around.
I refuse to be accompanied by the neglect not standing,
I tired people those laugh at I since sad to sympathize with by oneself,
Even frequently, I distinguish the true and false of the clear heart.
But,
They have left away, but I but the such one is unwilling.

All persons or things in the world are all easy to be forgotten easily.
It there is be something with the immortal,whose name is in nothing can’t lost.
Once had, I had lost gradually;
Once person, has left gradually.
Friendship and love, are defeated by great time.
We are dispersed in the wind of years, finally, will not see the trace.

Suddenly, I found I have been forgetting some people gradually too, some things, in the life far away from some people gradually.
The quiet one walks close, the quiet one is left.

Leave and forget
I am not afraid of forgetting, just will regret in the heart,
However, in the face of the interpersonal emotion, we are originally unable.
I think, it is all all right for us, the empty one moves ahead.

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Posted by li in 09:17:31 | Permalink | No Comments »

Friday, March 6, 2009

The train of thought of the life

The train of thought of the life, face the wind clearly and clearly
Act as the impetuous cloud, disperse
Sky
No longer painful, no longer cry
The sun
In it is dark blue in clear Nanjing
Open
Bright and warm and dim eyes

My youthful season, always have some luxuriant flowers
With green tree
Beautiful
Blue dream at starlit night
Always have some colored bee butterflies in the camp of drone, instigate
Lure me
Driving the cloud of the wing   

The life, in warm summer at last
Inspired ground
Tremble and open young feather feather
While smoking the fragrant wind in those, in the clustering round of the butterfly
Support, 45,000 kilometers of east wind
A vast sky of hurricane

Who, can really know the life is light
The life is heavy
Someone, can realize
4,000 kilometers of clouds moon, the fog dim frost is dense
Sough in autumn, under the wooden leaf
Whose side bloom flute, a dream of growing of butterfly with different colors floating in the air of one song
My heart
        Quiet and right and cloudless

Nobly leaf, has already shaken into in upset autumn in the rain helplessly
Do not send pinkly
The bee, does not come
I, check Qiu branch dark greenly
In the quiet moonlight, smile in strict quiet quiet severe winter
Just like,life pulse arm
Fill hard years
Face the wind clearly and clearly
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Posted by li in 09:28:30 | Permalink | Comments Off

Ai Qing in the poem

Ai Qing in the poem
It is in Ai Qing’s work that ” fallen leaves are collected “, it is not an important collection of poems, but it, for me, but there are special meanings. I have read this collection of poems for more than one time, and loved poems of writing from then on, it was this collection of poems, make me begin to worship the poet, the first taking the lead is Ai Qing. People all hope one’s own idol is fat, and is treated as weight, Ai Qing is totally heavyweight, as early as many years ago, he was known as the authorities of poetry circles.

In one afternoon several years ago, Ma Jun and I had a chance to visit Ai Qing at last. Before setting out, the different thing is put in my bag, one is two bottles of Dukang’s wine, one is this one ” fallen leaves are collected “, the former is an old poet Su’s gold umbrella was trusted the present that we passed on, the latter was carried secretly by me ” The smuggled goods ” .

I know the poet that I revered is advanced in years, can’t already speak normally, daily life of his basic necessities of life, wants someone to look after, in the face of this kind of natural law, but I can’t accept calmly. You can’t imagine your idol to have dull sight, the expression is misted. Remember Cheng NaiShan says: She reach U.S.A. idol to see her on the dose in being high when the Parker, she, kiss of Parker. But I do not think she should see Parker at all. So I must see Ai Qing offhandly.

Wife high Ying of Ai Qing receive we, read gold letter of umbrella Su, charge the wine, having expressed one’s gratitude, she waits for us to make demands having a sense of propriety very much. She has seen this kind of scene is too many, we can not attend to and go the polite formula either, head direct for the theme simply. I take out the bag kraft paper cover ” whether fallen leaf collect “, inside scribble many interjection read, I letter pen, such as ” Extremely wonderful ” , ” Definitely ” ,etc.,it is high Ying leaf through, smile it, go rooms north to let Ai Qing not signed after taking book, she comes out for a moment, say: ” Old Erik has good complexion today, spirit is very good. ” I receive the book and see suddenly, there are the title pages impressively” Ai Qing ” Two words, some of stroke shake, one party of Ai Qing prints bright red and small under one’s name, it is warm to expect this book to have Ai Qing’s hands, I sighed with deep feeling very much, combined with me ” Book of celebrity’s label with the title of a book on it ” Having has Ai Qing to inscribe for my collection of poems ” Luo Man area ” The title, I have been already perfectly contented.

People all value one’s own one very much ” First ” ,This copy ” whether fallen leaf collect ” account for me two number ones: One is the first collection of poems that I bought, one is my only signature not seeing the author himself get originally. As to me, Ai Qing has been glimmering in the poem all the time.
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Posted by li in 09:27:43 | Permalink | Comments Off